Send As SMS


Ten thousand years of Roboshrub.

Fangs for the memories.

In today’s state, Roboshrub Incorporated is an entity entirely devoted
to the execution of what normal people would refer to as “bad ideas.”

It was the creator’s original idea that all concepts, whether
useful or not, contribute to the global subconscious level of progress
for the human race. Therefore, we contend that no idea is an unfit
idea, and vow to act on each and every one of them.

Roboshrub Inc.
Public Communications Department

Changes may not fully take effect until you reload the page.

For your insolence, I condemn you to...

Suffer the Fate of a Thousand Bees!
(Before they go extinct)

Print Logo



Curses! A whole month gone, and what do I have to show for it?! Have I, the great and malevolent King Evil Robo-Bob Dole managed to capture the Roboshrub Capital/Headquarters?! No. Has my ally’s Armada Automata laid siege to the walls of the ancient supply sheds of Gardjaban? Kind of. Okay, not really. When I signed on to be the archetype of evil, the antagonist if you will, of Roboshrub Inc., I really expected a bigger, more robust role. Instead, I’ve been relegated to steerage. With my royal bloodline, I could have been the arch-enemy of any worthy foe across all the stars and even underwater.

Even the crazy guy who lives next door.

So today, instead of trying to invade you with Irish Rock music and armies, I’m going to try a different route and bring you around to my way of thinking through reasoned debate. Okay, here goes: I’m a king and you are a peasant. Obey me. That went well, don’t you think? Tomorrow I think I’ll go on tour so that I can demonstrate my fantastic debating skills to the unwashed masses, starting with that crazy guy who lives next door.

If I can teach him word-anger, or “debating” in the “new” English, the world is mine!

Until then, watch the skies. But not too closely! I don’t want your unworthy eyes to gaze upon the sun that I descended from. That’s right, according to my royal bloodline, the sun is my ancestor. Wanna fight about it?! Ha! I’m a king, you fool! You’ve already lost by default!

Processing 14×100 Robo-Comments:

Blogger L>T gesticulated...

"Dirty Rotten sons of Bitches" That is all I can say.

Or, cuddle into the warm bosom(?) of L>T.

Or, I find your word verifacation daunting.

5/06/2006 11:55 PM  
Blogger Rick Anonymi gesticulated...

We appreciate your punctuality. Keep your arms, legs, tail, wings, flippers, and extention chords inside the cart at all times. Price of admission is $10.

5/07/2006 12:32 AM  
Blogger flatlander gesticulated...

Word verification:


The negative-first commandment?

5/07/2006 12:35 AM  
Blogger Rick Anonymi gesticulated...

Negative first, negative third, whatever. It doesn't matter, as long as you've got a rubber hose and ten gallons of water.

5/07/2006 12:37 AM  
Blogger flatlander gesticulated...

It seems the rumours of your alien abduction were greatly exaggerated.

5/07/2006 12:49 AM  
Blogger Rick Anonymi gesticulated...

That's all they were... rumors.

5/07/2006 1:01 AM  
Blogger L>T gesticulated...

Listen 'Rick whoeveryouare' I was talking to His Majasty.
So butt out.

"Your Heinous, I (l>t the lusty one) reconize your cry for help. You need to know some of us peons do reconize royal BLOOD.
We, say in the spirit of Cinco de Mayo, "Ponemos la comida en estas ollasen la enfriadera."

5/07/2006 1:34 AM  
Blogger Roboshrub Incorporated gesticulated...

When Robodole says he has royal blood, he means the blood of royal sea otters. He bathes in it.

5/07/2006 11:07 AM  
Blogger His Majesty gesticulated...

Lies and smoke! I bathe in the blood of royal sea spotters, not otters! A sea spotter is a fancy name I use to describe soda bottles.

So their blood would be soda. I bathe in soda. Sprite, specifically.

5/07/2006 11:10 AM  
Blogger Salbert gesticulated...

Hmmmm, that crazy guy that lives next door has a lawnmower that does 40 mph, you could use that for world domination, but you will have to overcome Sal & Company Ltd.

5/07/2006 5:23 PM  
Blogger L>T gesticulated...

Ah, so you know spanish. That changes everything:
"Eche un poco mas salen el repollo."

5/08/2006 1:12 AM  
Blogger Bathroom Hippo gesticulated...

Nobody owns the sun.

Except the makers of Lamisil.

PS> Don't mess with Lamisil.

5/08/2006 1:14 AM  
Blogger His Majesty gesticulated...

My royal blood is not in question here! All that remains is whether or not you have prepared yourselves for utter devesation at the hands of the Armada Automata. They're coming.

5/08/2006 8:42 AM  
Blogger R2K gesticulated...

Love the mutton chops : )

5/08/2006 11:29 AM