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Ten thousand years of Roboshrub.

Fangs for the memories.

In today’s state, Roboshrub Incorporated is an entity entirely devoted
to the execution of what normal people would refer to as “bad ideas.”

It was the creator’s original idea that all concepts, whether
useful or not, contribute to the global subconscious level of progress
for the human race. Therefore, we contend that no idea is an unfit
idea, and vow to act on each and every one of them.

Roboshrub Inc.
Public Communications Department

Changes may not fully take effect until you reload the page.

For your insolence, I condemn you to...

Suffer the Fate of a Thousand Bees!
(Before they go extinct)

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How Do I Look To You?

Following up on an article I recently read regarding the rendering of images, I decided to paste together a montage of what our avatars look like under the different browsers we all use to bend the Internets to our will. Given the results of the article and my previous firsthand experience with all these browsers, I expected Internet Explorer to mangle our avatars, and Opera to benefit from its bicubic bedrock beyond all bound. Behold, the lenses of four different engines!

From left to right, the browser used was:

NOTE: I didn’t include a link to Firefox 3 because it won’t be released until November. The version I tested with is an early developer release, and is so unstable that its codename is “Minefield.” But the new graphics engine has already been implemented, so it’s a fair test.

I also didn’t test the way everyone’s avatars would look under “new Blogger” blogs, or how they would look if they were enlarged (though I hear Firefox is great at making images larger, with some kind of mystical bilinear filter from the future).

Jon the Intergalactic Warrior
Here’s a perfect example of the depravity I’ve been talking about. Anyone looking at Jon’s avatar in Internet Explorer or the current Firefox would assume he was some kind of gelatinous blob, instead of the macho warrior the dainty Opera browser depicts.

Like Jon, you can barely make out Flatlander’s stylized face amid the pixelation in browsers one and two. Where’s the zip? The pizazz? He even looks kind of angry to be in those browsers, wouldn’t you say?

Magnifique! The lovely Ms. Jin, like her baked goods, is a masterpiece in all browsers. I can see a distinct crispness in the Opera partition (which will make her smile as she reads this), though the quality of image scaling for photos seems to be equal across all browsers.

Professor Charles Xavier
The Professor looks a little off in Internet Explorer 7 and Firefox 2. A little... scrunched. Some browsers’ scaling algorithms must be more equal than others.

Captain Koma
Is it just me, or does Firefox 2 Koma seem a little surprised?

Bathroom Hippo
Firefox 3 seems uniquely suited to handling cartoons, with ease and integrity. For shame, Opera, for shame.

You can clearly see, if you look hard enough, the jagged edges on Tak’s helmet in Internet Explorer 7 and Firefox 2. And the words at the bottom of his avatar look a little less blurred in Firefox 3 and Opera, which is consistent with the article’s testing of tiny, typed text’s tidiness.

The Alpha and the Omega: all the yellow buttons are different cross-browser, the mouth looks better in Firefox 3 and Opera 9, and the fingers were poorly drawn to begin with. Yet, the orange bulb on the tip of the hat looks much less jagged in Firefox 3. I can’t explain that, other than to say that the Mozilla corporation is starting to design their graphics engines to accommodate me, personally.

By the way, if anyone wants a copy of their avatar from Opera/Firefox 3 to use, comment and I’ll send you a bitmap.

Processing 32×100 Robo-Comments:

Blogger Bathroom Hippo gesticulated...

I think you put too much thought into this.

I have invited the men in white to take you to a place where you'll be safe. Yes, safe.

2/06/2007 11:46 AM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

You're just cranky 'cause you didn't get your avatar browserscoped.


2/06/2007 12:23 PM  
Blogger Professor Huxley gesticulated...

Doesn't viewing these images through one of the mentioned browsers ruin all the data you've collected?

2/06/2007 1:11 PM  
Blogger Bathroom Hippo gesticulated...

I am the prettiest boy featured.

P.S. I think Huckleberry Hound wants his avatar scoped too.

2/06/2007 1:43 PM  
Blogger A Army Of (Cl)One gesticulated...

I would like Jin avatar sent over to me. And why don't you send her address, phone number, likes and dislike, favorite flowers and a plane ticket to her home state., while you are at it.

What!! It just for .... ummm.. research purposes. :)

2/06/2007 2:41 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

@Huxley: Those images aren't scaled, they're pictures of images that have been scaled, so it's perfectly fine.

@Hippo: His avatar can never be scoped- doctor's orders.

@Tak: Will you also be needing depleted uranium shells?! 'Cause that's like what you asked for, but only on opposite day!

2/06/2007 4:57 PM  
Anonymous Rich gesticulated...

Oh oh oh, do my avata-ahhh... so, how bout that local sporting team?

2/06/2007 6:50 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

Why don't you use your profile when commenting? You're, like, the one person that always has a direct link to your blog.

2/06/2007 10:03 PM  
Blogger jin gesticulated...

*HUGE jingrin*

Why, I do believe I am speechless.


Your post is amazing! I had no idea IE did that? I'd say just under 1/2 my readers still use it.

Excellent investigative technique Gyrobo!!! You get:

@ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @

LOL @ A Army Of (Cl)One! :-D

2/07/2007 12:04 AM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...


All browsers scale images, it's just a matter of quality. Opera has been beating everyone on this matter for years now.

2/07/2007 1:21 PM  
Blogger Professor Huxley gesticulated...

She is very photogenic, isn't she? So are Bhakti and that girl from Castle of Nannbugg.

I'm afraid dogs and robots tend not to photograph well.

2/07/2007 4:19 PM  
Blogger Bathroom Hippo gesticulated...

Huxley! Jin's dog doesn't eat meat! What is wrong with her dog?!?

2/07/2007 5:17 PM  
Anonymous Rich gesticulated...

It's part of my mystique...

...and goes well with my lime flavouring.

2/07/2007 6:03 PM  
Blogger Professor Huxley gesticulated...

Nothing wrong with vegetarianism. Some dogs believe that squirrels and rabbits and such might be SENTIENT!

What a pickle us carnivorous dogs would be in, eh? Oh, ho ho ho.

2/07/2007 7:49 PM  
Blogger Brioche gesticulated...

Oh, Professor Huxley!
You are CUTE!

Want to come over & hang with me, the bunny & my 2 squirrel friends?

Mum brings nuts & apples outside for ALL of us to share!

2/07/2007 8:55 PM  
Blogger R2K gesticulated...

Hi I just wanted to invite you to participate in my 3rd Caption Contest:


2/07/2007 9:27 PM  
Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator gesticulated...

Vedy interestink. Can I get that better lookin' avater?

2/07/2007 10:56 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

@Huxley: Squirrels aren't sentient. Stop filling our heads with lies and corrupting the children.

@Hippo: Dogs will be dogs, dog.

@Brioche: I don't let the professor out after dark. He's just not a rain dog.

@R2K: As always, a pleasure to participate.

@Jon: Vee can totally hook you up, ja.

2/07/2007 11:13 PM  
Blogger Professor Huxley gesticulated...

Oh, dear!

This is an emergency!

Can any of you play piano?

2/08/2007 12:24 AM  
Blogger flatlander gesticulated...

Yes, explorer has a way of twisting a bemused grin into an angry frown, a factor which many cyber-historians site as one of the leading causes of the great avatar massacre of 1919.

2/08/2007 4:34 AM  
Blogger Bhakti gesticulated...

***Bhakti crying*** I know I've been away for sometime, but c'mon...I can't stand looking so blurry anymore. I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT! Please send me to the Opera 9 so I can see what I'd look like if I were clear.

Love to you,
Blurry Bhakti
c/o Internet Explorer

Oh, BTW--Something just occurred to me: I am looking at your blog through the AOL browser, which is probably akin to Internet Explorer, no? and the avatars still look more crisp when looked at through Opera 9. I'm just wondering how much MORE crisp they would look if I were looking at your blog through the Opera 9 browser system thing! Does that question make sense to you? Or am I just a crazy person?

2/08/2007 1:28 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

The answer to all of your questions is "lint."

2/08/2007 1:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous gesticulated...

I'd switch to Opera, but I'd miss Stumbleupon too much.

2/08/2007 2:38 PM  
Blogger Arcturus gesticulated...

What's an avatar?

Wow -- four Bathroom Hippos. A whole pod!

Reading your blog always makes me feel so computer illerate. I don't understand about 3/4 of the stuff you're talking about.

2/10/2007 6:37 PM  
Blogger A Army Of (Cl)One gesticulated...

Don't worry! Gyrobo doen't understand 5/9th of it. Strange cuz I understand 8/31st.

2/11/2007 2:52 AM  
Blogger Lee Ann gesticulated...

That is way cool! I wonder what my picture looks like!
Have a great week!

2/12/2007 10:15 PM  
Blogger Lee Ann gesticulated...

Happy Valentine's Day Gyro!

2/13/2007 9:33 PM  
Blogger Bathroom Hippo gesticulated...


Oh, hey Kyle.

2/15/2007 12:25 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

Izza ka yah! My name is not Kyle!

2/15/2007 1:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous gesticulated...

Help, I can't post to roboshrub!

2/17/2007 9:01 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

You might be having a problem with the new Blogger. Can you get to the dashboard?

2/17/2007 10:19 PM  
Blogger Mr. R9NE gesticulated...

Never mind

2/18/2007 7:30 PM