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Ten thousand years of Roboshrub.

Fangs for the memories.

In today’s state, Roboshrub Incorporated is an entity entirely devoted
to the execution of what normal people would refer to as “bad ideas.”

It was the creator’s original idea that all concepts, whether
useful or not, contribute to the global subconscious level of progress
for the human race. Therefore, we contend that no idea is an unfit
idea, and vow to act on each and every one of them.

Roboshrub Inc.
Public Communications Department

Changes may not fully take effect until you reload the page.

For your insolence, I condemn you to...

Suffer the Fate of a Thousand Bees!
(Before they go extinct)

Print Logo


Window Seat

Window Seat Pictorial

It’s the middle of the morning’s night
And the air is so very cold.
Before I board the bus I find
My seat waiting in the hold.

Way in the back, collapsible,
And with a spiffy plastic armrest.
I’ve always sat up in that perch,
As the driver can attest.

But as I’m pulling out my pass,
Before I can reach the door,
She standing there, she’s in my seat!
Left me rolling on the floor


’Cause now I’m in this window seat
Looking up Pluto and Ceres.
’Cause now I’m hooked on dwarf planets;
Makes a fascinating study.

I don’t have time to analyze
With studious methodology
The findings of the IAU which
Established that category.

’Cause I’m sitting in this window seat
Trying to stay alive.
’Cause the temperature is dropping
From ten degrees to five.

My old seat is hers now,
And the plastic armrest, too.
And though I’d gladly fight for it
From Eris to the Moon,

I won’t.

’Cause I’m loving this old window seat
Despite its lack of legroom.
’Cause being cramped is not so bad
When you’re vilifying Pluto.

Turning printed pages softly
Over in my hands,
I’m sitting still and grumbling,
Mulling my latest plans.

’Cause I’m waiting in this window seat
For another day to end.
’Cause on the way back home, I’m sure
I’ll have my former seat again.

Real sure.

’Cause I’m brooding in this window seat
’Cause I really don’t like change.
And sitting in this window seat
Is picking at my brain.


Processing 32×100 Robo-Comments:

Anonymous Rich gesticulated...

You really can write about anything cant you! This was touching. I was moved. I needed to use the bathroom.

In good news, I just almost suffered the death of a thousand bees. Luckily grovelling like lunch meat to me.

10/27/2006 9:41 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

It's already Saturday in Australia?! ¡Cuán extraño!

10/27/2006 10:10 PM  
Blogger L>T gesticulated...

I can relate to the BUS experience in poetry, because i've been there!

10/28/2006 12:50 AM  
Blogger jin gesticulated...

I have NO self restraint.

At least when it comes to clicking.

...and chocolate.


...and cappuccino.

Oh, yeah...

...and, wait... nevermind.

(I'll let you practice a bit of self restraint trying not to envision what I was going to say.)

GROVEL robot!

10/28/2006 1:20 AM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

The grovelment has beginulated!

10/28/2006 1:25 AM  
Anonymous Rich gesticulated...

I'm tremulating at the grovebeginulation!

10/28/2006 6:19 AM  
Blogger 13 gesticulated...

give up the plastic arm-rest?

good god, man! have you forgoTten the Cause for all things plasticky and armresty?

*sigh* i must now go sob for the loss of the armrest...

...twas a good rest hard and plasti-cated

...never let anyone down

...never spoke back, never argued

aye, that was a good armrest, that was.


10/28/2006 11:58 AM  
Blogger Monkey gesticulated...

I just suffered the fate of a thousand bees. And lived to tell about it... without pants!

Take that!

10/28/2006 1:31 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

Pants are more overrated than dog food.

10/28/2006 4:53 PM  
Blogger ticharu gesticulated...

Oh, you shouldn't pick at it, it'll get infected!

10/28/2006 7:56 PM  
Blogger Bathroom Hippo gesticulated...


You love me.

Beta conversion was a pain in the backside. I spent an hour looking for progress-bar code that would work with beta....none of them did because of the certain I had to make my own...I'm a freakin VB/Flash programmer not a freakin XML douchebag. I broke character.


You got that thing I sent?

10/28/2006 8:03 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

I always have problems... with XML.

You can make sentences seem weird... by adding ellipses... just about anywhere.

10/28/2006 8:47 PM  
Blogger Bathroom Hippo gesticulated...

Hey! That's trademarked!

Maybe I shall steal your common over-use of italics!

10/28/2006 9:34 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

Grrr... I think Blogger is having another episode... numbers are not updating!

10/28/2006 10:19 PM  
Blogger jin gesticulated...

Can I ask you guys a question about italics?
When browsing in Opera, any time someone puts a comment in italics, all I can see is:
unless they use "em /em" but no one does! they all use "i /i"
So then I have to go over to firefox just to read the italics (& sometimes it's really not worth it! LOL!)
Do I need a plug-in, a preference change or is that just how it is???

10/28/2006 11:12 PM  
Blogger Bathroom Hippo gesticulated...

I imagine it's just Gyrobo's rich text editor that's causing those problems? I'm not sure...but when in doubt...always use ellipses and blame Gyrobo.

10/28/2006 11:44 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

The first time I heard about that problem with italics in Opera was a year ago, since destructobob uses it. She was all, "why did you write "/*" and I was like, "what?"

I have no idea why Blogger renders comments that way in Opera. But I've seen the code behind the comments, and it looks like a problem with Opera. All that speed comes at a steep price, my friend.

Besides, using em instead of i is probably a good idea, since it helps people using text-to-speech technology.

10/28/2006 11:48 PM  
Blogger jin gesticulated... I have to live with it. :-P
Thank you both, anyway! :-)

When I first saw it I thought it was one of those word abbreviations or something ....*blush*

10/29/2006 12:28 AM  
Blogger anonymous gesticulated...

So what about this speed of the Opera Is it really really fast?

10/29/2006 1:05 AM  
Blogger anonymous gesticulated...

Or is it same as firefox?

10/29/2006 1:08 AM  
Blogger L>T gesticulated...

gyrobo, I just really read the poem. I like it.

It's nice to know i'm not the only one having trouble with my numbers updating.

10/29/2006 7:49 AM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

@Anonymous: Browsing this should clear up any questions you might have about web browser speeds. Opera consistently gets higher marks for speed than Firefox. I like using both.

@L>T: Blogger has been having all kinds of problems, what with their general failure and all.

10/29/2006 11:16 AM  
Blogger jin gesticulated...

Anonymous used 1/2 i & half em.
So, of course I had to go over to firefox to read the second half. :-P

Opera is really really fast for me.
I can also have 10+ tabs open & my pc doesn't crash. In firefox I usually can't open more than 4-5 tabs at once. But that's just my pc.

I can't publish in Opera on blogger. It turns out all funky (funky bad not funky good)! LOL. My sentences go across the whole page & the fonts are all different sizes even though blogger has claimed to fix the Opera publishing problem. :-P

(hmmm...anonymous comment #2 seems to look suspiciosly like hippos handwriting???)

10/29/2006 10:32 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

The second anonymous comment combined the B and STRONG tags. I have no idea who it is, or what their game is... other than their conspicuously ardent anti-water agenda.

10/29/2006 10:35 PM  
Blogger Roboshrub Incorporated gesticulated...

Nigel would aprove, bless his zombie heart.

10/29/2006 11:40 PM  
Blogger R2K gesticulated...

I love the bus.

10/30/2006 12:13 PM  
Blogger 13 gesticulated...

i think roboshrub should stage a coup over the blogsphere...

...french revolution style. :)

10/30/2006 2:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous gesticulated...

I am so sick of water!!!

10/30/2006 8:56 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

The last time we staged a coup, the British parliament stepped in and tried to buy us off with baked goods and a fake treasure map.

We're still looking for those doubloons.

10/30/2006 10:03 PM  
Blogger Bunyan, Paul Bunyan gesticulated...

Are you a bus?

10/30/2006 10:14 PM  
Blogger jin gesticulated...

See, now that's the kind of comment I HATE going all the way over to firefox to read!!!

anonymous you did that on purpose!!! ARGGGHhhh.....

gyrobo: It's almost you have a costume yet?

10/31/2006 1:08 AM  
Blogger Bathroom Hippo gesticulated...

Blue man group?

That's not a real costume!

10/31/2006 10:12 AM