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Ten thousand years of Roboshrub.

Fangs for the memories.




In today’s state, Roboshrub Incorporated is an entity entirely devoted
to the execution of what normal people would refer to as “bad ideas.”

It was the creator’s original idea that all concepts, whether
useful or not, contribute to the global subconscious level of progress
for the human race. Therefore, we contend that no idea is an unfit
idea, and vow to act on each and every one of them.

Roboshrub Inc.
Public Communications Department






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For your insolence, I condemn you to...

Suffer the Fate of a Thousand Bees!
(Before they go extinct)

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3.22.2006

Prince Albert Trapped In Can, Blair Says

"Our beloved Prince Albert has become entrapped in a cylindrical container," cried British Prime Minister Tony Blair over international airwaves yesterday morning. Long thought to be an old English legend, the hitherto unknown crown prince Albert Windsor was discovered to be trapped early Tuesday after a rubbish transport facilitator (garbage man) heard a strange pounding noise coming from the inside of a garbage bin. Top British scientists have X-rayed the can, to no avail. "The interior of this particular bin is coated with a layer of lead," remarked one of the radiologists at the latest press briefing. "We can't even drill an air hole until we learn what position the immobile prince is crouched in. He may be in the fetal position, but we have no way of knowing that."


A suspicious man arrested in connection with the "canning."

The incident has sparked an international outcry, with millions of donations pouring in. Common folk the world over are trying to find empathy with the prince by sealing themselves in metallic containers, the act of which is now termed "Alberting" and is catching on among teenagers. Music superstar Bono is planning a new album to give hope to the prince, as well as any other people trapped in cans. Even President Bush was somber when told the shocking news:

"When I first heard about Prince Albert being trapped in a can I was 12 years old. I wanted to help, but I had no idea where the can was that Al was in. So I regularly called people randomly on the phone asking if they had prince Albert in the can. I for one was surprised by the lack of insensitivities that people showed against the prince."

Though numerous landfill ecologists and escape artists have been brought in at the behest of the Blair administration, none can figure out a way to retrieve the prince.

Processing 16×100 Robo-Comments:

Blogger Bhakti gesticulated...

Tony Blair Witch Project?

Okay...just wanted to say thank you for the birthday cat!

And, I love your new image!

Cheers,
Bhakti

3/22/2006 8:08 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

Don't mention it, magical flying lady!

3/22/2006 8:13 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

But it's all dependent on Roboshrub. He picked the original template. If he doesn't like it, I restore it to the way it was.

But I'm fully confident that he will accept the inevitable.

3/22/2006 8:15 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

And apparently, the inevitable is extremely evitable. We must learn to live with it.

3/22/2006 8:38 PM  
Blogger L>T gesticulated...

Dear Ed,
That is so enlighning. I always thot he was a figament of a 1956 teenagers imagination.
The things you can learn on the internet, tis amazing!!

3/23/2006 1:04 AM  
Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator gesticulated...

Yes, the Internets are an amazing place.

Would a sonic can opener help? I think I have one in my other Old Navy Cargo Shorts somewhere.

3/23/2006 1:34 PM  
Blogger angel, jr. gesticulated...

Is that the same as the beer?

3/23/2006 3:53 PM  
Blogger flu gesticulated...

I hope they can catch the refridgerator in time.

3/23/2006 6:21 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

The poor prince! Someone help that ponderous noble!

3/23/2006 8:05 PM  
Blogger Salbert gesticulated...

DON'T TRUST THE COKE! Pepsi is the way to go...

3/23/2006 8:15 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

That's what I keep saying, but I keep getting visions of orange soda.

3/23/2006 8:22 PM  
Blogger The Taker of Gist gesticulated...

Libel! Wait, did you say Albert or Edmonde? Because I can attest to the fact that Edmonde is alive and well, ruining my plans. Ever single day.

3/23/2006 9:08 PM  
Blogger Mahndisa S. Rigmaiden gesticulated...

03 24 06

That is funny! Believe it or not, I actually have a Prince Albert tobacco can from many years ago! Ha, I always enjoy your creativity.

3/25/2006 3:41 PM  
Blogger His Majesty gesticulated...

It's a very serious matter! If the price isn't retrieved, who will be the next powerless figurehead for the British Empire?!

3/25/2006 9:14 PM  
Blogger unregistered text offender gesticulated...

free him?!? DON'T YOU REALISE WE PUT HIM IN THERE FOR A REASON, oh if only that tony blair could keep his mouth shut.

3/28/2006 6:35 AM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

What a country!

Reminds me of the time Abraham Lincoln was forced to build ten log cabins in one day. That's why he bacame president in the first place.

3/28/2006 10:12 AM