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Ten thousand years of Roboshrub.

Fangs for the memories.

In today’s state, Roboshrub Incorporated is an entity entirely devoted
to the execution of what normal people would refer to as “bad ideas.”

It was the creator’s original idea that all concepts, whether
useful or not, contribute to the global subconscious level of progress
for the human race. Therefore, we contend that no idea is an unfit
idea, and vow to act on each and every one of them.

Roboshrub Inc.
Public Communications Department

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For your insolence, I condemn you to...

Suffer the Fate of a Thousand Bees!
(Before they go extinct)

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You Cannot Run From The Upgrade!

Many computer-related things have happened in the last couple of weeks: the Canadian Parliament forbid iPods from being inserted into nuclear reactor cores, the USB scalp waxer was patented, an IRS glitch gave Jon Stewart an “h,” and MySpace banned emos.

Pointless Scribble!

Ignore all of that! The only technological news worth reading is the kind I jot down as I build the future. You- you think I’ve just been on some holiday, like Mister Bean? Unlike Alberto Gonzales, I have a job. And not some cushy, unimportant gig like Attorney General. Crushing cardboard canisters can cause collapsed calves! Yet thanks to me, the children of heartland America won’t be tempted to stray from their schoolwork to build cardboard forts. It was a three-month-long tour, starting in June. You may have heard of Gyrobo the Magnificent, master of the box dance? The other contributors on this blog were my roadies.

Yes, finding the time to (need I say it again?) build the future hasn’t been a walk in the dark. But when you, the people, take a gander at what Roboshrub Inc. has been cooking up behind the scenes, you’ll simply implode.

€ncryptør Widget 1.65
Browser €ncryptør 1.65

Yay×10¼! To see the myriad list of changes, it would be helpful to have a changelog. And it just so happens that one exists! If you’re using Opera, I suggest — and this is just a suggestion, not an advisory — that you install the newest version while beforehand deleting the old version. This may seem obvious, but there are trees using this widget.

I fully realize that bludgeoning the blogosphere with constant update reminders (I think this is the third so far this year) is both rude, repugnant and recursive. Therefore: there is only one alternative: a separate blog (with its own RSS feed, by golly!) to gently tap your arm and scream in your face when I get the urge to whip out a new web app.

Have at it and eat a lemon wedge.

Processing 10×100 Robo-Comments:

Blogger G3T Films gesticulated...

My lemon wedge was kept in a box... it was mysteriously crushed along with my box fort when I went to lunch.

9/02/2007 11:54 PM  
Blogger A Army Of (Cl)One gesticulated...

That explained what happened to by vacation Cardboard Fort in Kansas. I had believed it was crushed by monkeys disguised at Senator Larry Craig.

But now I find it was caused you Roboshrub roadies! *shake fist towards the sky with impotent rage*

Curse You Roboshrub, Inc. Curse you and your bettering the future ways!!

9/04/2007 4:48 PM  
Blogger Fluke Starbucker gesticulated...

ok, this does it. No more JD and coke for me before brunch ANYMORE!

9/05/2007 12:24 PM  
Blogger concerned citizen gesticulated...

Oh i miss you guys! I'm sorry i said what i did about robots.

You can come & leave comments on my new blog.

:) :) :) :) :) :) :(

9/06/2007 11:06 PM  
Blogger R2K gesticulated...

This comment has been removed by the author.

9/09/2007 9:26 AM  
Blogger R2K gesticulated...

I am goth!

Please join me for a caption contest:

Send in your edited cartoon and-or vote on the work of others.


9/17/2007 7:00 PM  
Blogger Bhakti gesticulated...

Hi Gyrobo! I have just visited Flatlander and I wanted to tell you, too that I miss you. When I first started blogging--it was you and Flathead (flatlander) and me and a couple other people. Then, I fell off the face of the Earth (yes, the Earth IS round, but it does have a Face--and I fell off it. That's where the proof lies: in the pudding.)

Well, I don't blog that much anymore, but I do miss your comraderie (did I spell that correctly??).

I've been spending my time studying music theory and trying to get better---I'm actually doing more things--but doing things kicks my ass and I end up back in bed. But at least I'm doing things, right?

Let's keep in touch.
You are the creator of my Avatar, after all!

Please visit soon. My blog-o-home just ain't the same without ya.


9/18/2007 11:37 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

@EVERYONE: Remember, together we can move mountains. Keep those chins up; you are the exception, not the rule.

@Rich: Lemons will become very valuable after the sundering. Take care of yours.

@Tak: It must've been Larry Craig. I was in Prague that weekend, hogging the pogs.

@Fluke: Sugar messes with your midichlorians.

@Concerned: Can and will.

@R2K: Already considered and accepted!

@Bhakti: I've missed you too! Hope you feel much better this quarter.

9/21/2007 8:51 PM  
Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator gesticulated...

You were right. It was long.

9/21/2007 10:50 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo gesticulated...

Hey, numbers don't lie.

9/22/2007 12:13 AM